Over the last few days, I have had too much time to ponder on the dimensions of love and its many perplexities: the love that provokes a mother to abandon her family? The love that leads one to lose all that which he loves?
They say the love of God is the root of all knowledge. Is it possible to love God to the extent that you denounce the very children that out of your womb came?
I am filled with questions and in a short supply of answers. It’s true Jesus said we should leave our families and follow him, but to my interpretation, it doesn’t mean abandon or cast them out, it simply means God should be priority in your life; he should precede your family. Your love for him should come first.
I recently made a decision to become a Christian: to live, preach the gospel. I have made many decisions alike to this in the past, but now it’s different. I know it’s different because I no longer seek a religion, I seek a relationship. I no longer seek to see his face- though that’d be great, but I believe his truth whether I see him or not.
I haven’t magically gotten answers to all my questions/concerns as regards religion, but now, even in my confusion, I feel his peace. Even in my fear, his boldness comes upon me. In my times of need, I know he provides.
I choose to be guided aright. I’d check myself every once in a while with the slogan, ‘WHAT WOULD JESUS DO?’
For me, the love of Christ is a dark gift, one that triggers my passion for redemption. One that introduces me to the miracle that I am.