By
Adejoh Idoko Momoh
One of my first experiences with Islam was in my mother’s
reading room; as she busied herself in the corner reading and chanting verses
from her Koran, I picked up a bright purple and yellow book. Its title startled
me:
‘Islam forbids the free mixing of men
and women’
I remember fondly then I wanted nothing to do with a religion
that would seek to forbid my association with my mother and sisters: the only
females I had come to see as role models at the time.
It was not until 2007 when I travelled to the Islamic holy
land, visited the holy shrine and stood at the foot of al-Hajar al-Aswad or the
black stone in my ritualistic dress that I realized this doctrine is tradition
at best. Adopted by a few, practiced overtime and has come to be accepted as
right.
First off, there is no separation of
sexes in the holy Ka’abah: I walked with and took instructions from my mother
as we performed the tawaf - the circular walk around the Ka’abah, we were together
during prayers and several other men and women prayed alongside each other.
This was particularly refreshing for me, in some way, it made me more
interested in the religion, in learning its tenets.
I began to wonder, the Ka’abah and
the rituals surrounding it are relics of Islam in its purest form as observed
by the Holy Prophet (SAW), if there was any need to separate sexes in Islam
wouldn’t it be obvious in this holy mosque? Would efforts not have been made to
build a female section behind the male section in the Ka’abah?
My mum had constantly told us that
her aim was to read the Koran wholly from cover to cover inside the holy
Ka’abah before we had to return to Nigeria, so when hunger began to whirl in my
brother and I, she suggested we have lunch at a Kentucky Fried Chicken close to
the mosque. I grumbled a bit, wanting to eat some home cooked food but that
trip to KFC would eventually provoke some curiosity in me, make me interested
in the religion and its truths.
Inside the restaurant, there was a
partition with bright red labels that read ‘Men’ and another that read ‘Women’-
I sighed to myself and muttered ‘the separation of sexes Nigerian mosques are
so familiar for finally shows up here’. A giggle would later escape my lips as
we sat to eat.
My brother would ask why I laughed
and in dismissing his questioning, I would simply nod and say I just remembered
something funny. In reality, I thought of the irony and hypocrisy inherent, it
is okay for men and women to mix when they prayed and it is not okay for men
and women to mix while they eat?
Adejoh Momoh (momoh.adejoh@gmail.com) can be followed on twitter @adejoh
